How "it" Happened

This morning was different. Startled, I woke in my bed to see all the lights on in the room. The shower was running in the bathroom and the digital clock on my nightstand glowed with the green numbers, 7,4, and 5.

"My God; he's late!" I jumped out of bed to meet my naked husband entering the bathroom nervously muttering, "I'm really late." I asked him what time he had to leave and he replied, 8 o'clock. "Can I still go with you?" I asked. "You'll need to be ready to leave in ten minutes," he replied with punctuation. Pushing toward the sink, I brushed my teeth, flossed, splashed my face with cold water, ran a brush through my hair, swooshed on deodorant, dabbed moisturizer on my face and slathered oil on my legs. Zipping back to the bedroom, drawers magically flew open; I jumped feet first into underwear then hooked a bra efficiently in place. Next conquering the closet I zoned in and pounced on a nicely pressed pair of black pants, a white V-neck cotton blouse and the first black sandals that caught my eye. I was on fire, stopping only to help my husband find the right tie and to grab some old journals, files, a pen, my IPod, reading glasses and my purse.

In the kitchen I drank some cold water, gave the cats water and food, filled my husbands big green water jug just in time to see him walking out the door saying, "I'll meet you outside." He operates without food and I do not. Quickly, I found a freezer bag, the kind that grocery stores sell to keep food cold for a few hours, filled it with 2 granola bars, 2 yogurts, 2 apples, 2 tangerines, 2 cheese sticks, spoons, napkins and a cold pack. With everything loaded down in my arms I said "Adios!" to the cats and closed the door behind me.

My husband had been sitting in the car in the driveway; when I got in I looked at the clock on the dashboard it was exactly 8:03. He had to be in Marco Island by 9:30 to see a client about their health insurance renewal. He said, "We'll never make it before 10." Calmly, I said, "We'll get there by 9:30". It took all of 10 minutes to drive from our house to alligator alley. On the alley there was construction and more cops than I had ever seen. At 9:00 we came to the exit for Marco Island. "Only 16 miles to Marco; see we are going to make it" I said. The response I heard was, "I don't know; there's a lot of traffic between here and where we need to go." "We will make it," I said. At 9:30 we pulled into the parking lot and my husband went in to see his client. I didn't gloat. I sat in the car with the engine running.

Through the front window of the car I stared at a palm tree with about eight big lush flowing frons. It was set against a newly constructed office building that was painted red brick with red brick Mexican barrel tiles. I made myself comfortable in the front seat of his Ford Explorer and put my IPod on. I turned it to Deepak Chopra's meditation from "The Book of Secrets" entitled, "The World is in You." I closed my eyes like so many other mornings, became aware of my breath, sensations in my body and my thoughts. I was not comfortable. I could hear the sounds of cars zooming by. I could feel the vibration of the seat beneath me. Then I focused on my breath and before I knew it the meditation was over. I opened my eyes and looked at that palm tree with it's big full frons blowing in the wind. Then I tuned my IPod to subliminal music for vibrant health and energy. I no longer focused on the roaring of the engines passing in the street next to me or the hum beneath my body. I just kept looking at that tree. It had something to tell me.

Picking up the binder that I read every morning after my mediation, "The Cosmic Supply Catalogue" I started to flip through its pages. In it's loose leaf pages, there are pictures, empty pages, and messages that I enjoy reading every morning. Some examples are, "I meditate every day." "I can have do or be anything I want." "I know what I love to do" and "I hold on to absolutely clear thoughts of what I want." Then there are pictures of properties that I photocopied from the Internet of land that's for sale. Properties that my husband and I will own one day. Each page is detailed, down to pictures of hot pink bougainvilleas in emerald green pots that will be at the front entry of our new home on the large piece of land. I flip through every page every morning and this morning when I flipped to the last page which read, "My mission today is to be joyous!" I shut the book and looked up at that palm tree waving at me again. It clearly said, "Tag you're it."

I opened the cover of The Cosmic Catalogue again and the air conditioning vents blew cold air flipping the pages until I read, "Who Am I?" Then my pen flew on a blank piece of paper with the following words: "It". It allows this body to see that tree. It allows the mind to remember to call it "tree". It allows the mind to ask, where did I go to find the memory to know it is called "tree"? It is behind all. It is. It is all. It is behind all of my thoughts, all of my emotions, all of my actions and my every move. I am nothing without it. I do not exist without it. It has no start. It has no end. It is everywhere. It is everything. The it in that tree is the it in me. It does not leave, it is eternal and infinite. My organic body is not it. I am nothing without it. And the tree that is waving at me is also nothing with out it. All I am is it. Tag, You're it!